Letters To My Mother

Her Story About Voting and Hope

My mom

Dear Mom,

I want to preserve your stories. The stories you told of how you grew up in the poverty of West Virginia during the Great Depression. I want your granddaughter to know them, to absorb the wisdom they contain.

Since it is near a pivotal mid-term election, I am reminded of your story about importance of voting. I heard you tell this story so many times I memorized your words, and so I will let your words tell the story—

“It was early November. Don’t remember the date or day. I was about nine years old when it happened. Back up in the mountains, in the hollers*, people would to cook food for a family where someone was ill or if the woman had just had a baby, and the kids, like around my age then, we’d deliver it.

It was my mother’s turn to make a food bundle for a neighbor family in the holler. The woman had just given birth a little while ago but was suffering with sickness after. So that afternoon, my mother sent me up there with a pot and a bundle of food for the family. I had no trouble going down the road to deliver the food. But it seemed such a long way. It was already twilight by the time I got there to deliver the food.

So, on the way back, I decided going through the woods would be quicker. But I’d never been through the woods. I ended up getting all turned around and couldn’t find my way back to the road. By that time, it was pitch dark. I was so scared. I heard something that sounded like a big animal, a bear or something, so I climbed up a tree where I thought it would be safe. It was damn cold that night too.

I was scared. I was cold. I knew my mother was going to be pissed off. Early in the morning, it must have been just as it was getting light, I heard all these people calling for me. I could hear my father above all of the others. I shimmied down that tree so happy to be found. I yelled out. My father was the first to reach me. He scooped me up. My mother, she was lightening mad. She was rambling on about teaching me a lesson about not running off like that. She took out her little knife she always had in her apron pocket and cut a switch off a tree. She grabbed me from my father and said I needed a good whippin’. Now, my father, he usually let my mother do the disciplinin’ of us kids because he was always working in the mines or traveling to find work in other mines or farms. But not that day. He swept me up and grabbed my mother’s wrist as she started to drawback, and he said, ‘Renie, ain’t nobody gonna whip any of my kids today! Nobody! Even you, their Mama. Franklin Delano Roosevelt was elected our president yesterday, so today we’re gonna celebrate that because we got somethin’ to hope for.’ My mother dropped her switch and kept her head down as my father carried me home. The rest of the people took off to their homes.

And we did. We had hope. Took time but things started to get better little by little.”

Then we would watch the Watergate hearings and you would throw your house slipper at the 13-inch black and white television sitting on the kitchen buffet, ranting about how you couldn’t understand why people would vote for a crook like Nixon especially when Marylanders knew Agnew was a damn crook from the start and birds of a feather and all.

Your rant always ended with “that’s why you vote. Keep the crooks out. Get good people in who care about us. Not these guys who wanna line their pockets.” By then you may have knocked back a six pack, but there is no denying that you were right, Mom. You were absolutely right.

*holler- hollow, I know. But my mother and aunt always said holler so I use her words as this is her story.

American Promise

I created this image using AI

I do not want the old America back.

I do not want the old America

where hate simmered

like a hissing tea kettle

ready to blast a whistle

strong enough to tear

a silent house apart.

I do not want the old America

where arrogance celebrated

the genocidal parade

against the indigenous people

from whom we stole this land.

I do not want the old America

where each new wave of immigrants

is viewed as a less than human infestation

to be eradicated.

I do not want the old America

where people climb and stand

upon the backs of others

for greedy profiteering.

I do not want the old America

who will not acknowledge

its past mistakes.

I do not want an arrogant America,

believing freedom and greatness

are measured by the damage

caused when the twins

of cruelty and brutality

are loosed upon the land.

I want an America

who can stand up strong enough

in the face of ignorance, prejudice, and greed

and in truthful wisdom say,

“We had moments of greatness.

Fleeting moments washed away

by fears of weakness and scarcity,

pointless, needless fears.

We will be great by being

the promise we were meant to be.”

This is the America I want to see.

Ghost Cells

image_9740e2ab-f2d8-48f1-a95a-6eee4d6d75bc
Image courtesy of Hubspot.com (Katherine J. Wu)

Links to articles that inspired this piece listed at the end.









Time reaches across

cold decades of Decembers,

whispering of you

in me,

of me

in her,

of me

entwined

between

you and her

within those eight days

of December

containing

ghosts of ghost

cells

there dwells

somewhere

inside Time’s touch,

understanding.

https://r.search.yahoo.com/_ylt=Awr48w5gkDRptO4H7YRXNyoA;_ylu=Y29sbwNncTEEcG9zAzEEdnRpZAMEc2VjA3Ny/RV=2/RE=1766262112/RO=10/RU=https%3a%2f%2fwww.theatlantic.com%2fscience%2farchive%2f2024%2f01%2ffetal-maternal-cells-microchimerism%2f676996%2f/RK=2/RS=.hmJ5tDlCRabLTKKHGU._cfCiKE-

https://r.search.yahoo.com/_ylt=Awr48w5gkDRptO4H_4RXNyoA;_ylu=Y29sbwNncTEEcG9zAzcEdnRpZAMEc2VjA3Ny/RV=2/RE=1766262112/RO=10/RU=https%3a%2f%2fwww.newscientist.com%2farticle%2fmg26134751-100-cells-from-other-family-members-live-in-you-and-protect-your-health%2f/RK=2/RS=aeOmCjbh8vLOmKkmucoRm92XlVY-

Of Belonging


Credit: K. Kunte, Harvard University
The swallowtail paid a visit this morning, 
a flutter of striped wings,
tipped itself in hello
as we sipped coffee
and looked up from our morning paper.

We smiled at the swallowtail then each other.
You swear it is the transformed caterpillar
we rescued from certain death
as it hung from the dog’s lip
and then tenderly placed
in safety on the gourd vine leaves
growing by the wood pile.

I do not know. It could very well be.
It is beautiful in its flight.
Its morning joyful greeting of belonging,
of having found its place.

These mornings are life here with you.

of sea level and altitude

Photo by Valdemaras D. on Pexels.com
Forgive me, I ramble,
telling you of life at sea level--

where a steady pour of hours stream,
and minutes bead against the windowpanes
as the seconds mist into fog--
decades of earth and rock liquify--
A mottled mix of flowing colors and viscosities
defiant and devoid of any beauty
to ease a slippery sharp-edged flow
carving out an emptiness
within this near ghost of a soul
waiting in unacknowledged darkness,
while asking for a way to the light—

before waking in the softness
of morning at altitude.

Shattered Stone

image courtesy of Jenő Szabó on Pixabay.com

Inside a sarcophagus of stone,
I have dwelled,
a hard place in which to learn to live,
no breath taken, heart stilled, 
where all living shrinks down,
behind skin and soul, 
to be bound in hieroglyphic wrappings
designed by others.
Onlookers believing 
the pretense they wish to see--
as I stopped struggling for air,
a mimic of the beating rhythms of life,
accepting the coldness of the stone.

Any warmth transitory as the sun
in its travels from
season to season
from rise to set,
in these years 
I have known only coldness
after any fleeting glimpse of warmth.

Such a bitter coldness--
though none would think
I lived encased within stone,
so life-like my hieroglyphic mask,
a masterful mimic I had become.

Until stone cracked,
by mountain winds and sun,
falling in splintered shards,
crumbling to dust ‘round me.
My tattered, faded wrappings
torn, hanging loosely.
Until a hand, as if in possession 
of long forgotten, ancient magic,
should touch long dead embers,
and in touching rekindle flame,
swirling within, spiraling outward 
warmth that does not die
upon the withdrawal of touch. 

A heat lingering, warming still,
stirs hunger once thought dead to life.
Sweetness pounds a rhythm out—
starting a heart to beat again,
blessed breath returns 
to deflated lungs,
the shallow breath, the weak pulse 
hold ancient power,
leaving flesh and blood and bone
to move in life again,
a life reclaimed from the stone
of gray filled years.

Cautiously, hesitantly, 
I step over the dust of shattered stone,
making my way toward the touch 
that carefully, tenderly removed
my tattered hieroglyphic bindings,
allowing me to move freely
within my own skin.

There trembles within,
a longing I never sought to find.
Hope rises and takes Fear 
within its embrace,
transforming it to joy,
as I extend my hand
to the warmth of you.

In Light of You

photo courtesy of Cannundrum.blogspot.com

Here, beneath the trees,
we sit in the peace 
of a sunlit afternoon.
My words, my pale pathetic words,
fade in the light of you.

As the words 
I grasp at as possibilities
to say all I mean
evaporate 
from my hands and mind
like the water
in this drying arroyo
shrinks away from its banks
before us, 
I am left wordless.

For no words can stand
in the light of you
and the gifts you bring
to places where
I discovered 
pieces missing
in light of you.

If I Could Sing

I would sing melodies

of healing to fade the scars of yesterday’s pain.

I would sing tales

            of velvet nights to cushion any regrets.

I would sing the notes

            of the forests and mountains for the joys of today.

I would sing songs

            of promises made and kept in the morrows to come.

I would sing hymns

            of praise and gratitude for you.

Of Stones and Weeds

Image courtesy of Reddit.com

I could rake these stones.
Free these tiny weeds
which my feeble fingers fumble to grab
and tweeze out. 
Yes, with a rake,
I could disturb the harmony
of stones, free the weeds—

But no.  

I have had enough of stones.
I’ve enough of their weight 
placed upon me.
I’ve carried the tonnage of stone
from place to place,
lived under it,
barely breathing through years,
lived decades encased within a sarcophagus 
of other’s demands and expectations,
all shattered now in lovely shards
left in the distance behind me.

No, I will leave these stones undisturbed.
They will not take up my time.
There are other ways to weed,
and should the weeds take the stones,
there is beauty to be found in the wildness of weeds.

Of Wounds and Winter

Image courtesy of PxFuel.com
Winter exists in this quiet realm:
The place of spring dreams
where from rich loam
colors emerge vibrant,
as if hope, become a virgin,
offered her hand 
to lessen Winter’s ache 
enough the wounded reach
to touch without wounding
in the trying.